Disbelief

The other day I was talking to one of my best friends and realized I hadn't told her about my no-kissing policy. I explained to her my intent, and she laughed in my face. She genuinely laughed at me and said, "There's no way you're going to do that!" Really? She has that little faith in me? I chuckled and said, "Wanna bet?"

It's a little bit hurtful that people close to me don't believe that I can do it. I went home that night and laid in bed thinking, "What have I gotten myself into?! CAN I do it?" But I never intended this to be easy. And when I kiss my fiance for the first time, knowing that I have saved my lips for him to t>10 months (and probably greater than 3 years), it will be worth it. Looking back on the guys I have kissed, though I don't regret any of them, my life wouldn't be lacking anything if I hadn't kissed them.

I press on.

Nothing to Tell

I guess it's about time for a new post here. I don't have a lot to say, which is good. No action is precisely what I'm after, right?

I started school on Monday. I'm surrounded by guys in my engineering and math classes, but let's face it...these are engineering and math majors. The likelihood of them tempting me is slim. So when it comes to staying true to my no-kissing policy, life is pretty easy right now.

A bit of a boring post, yes, but I felt the need to add one. Those of you who are rooting for me, rest easy that I have no temptations. Those of you who are rooting against me, well, right now you're failing. :)

Taking the Plunge

A big part of my commitment to not kiss is telling as many people as possible. I have a lot of pride and I hate admitting when I mess up, so the more people I tell about my commitment, the more incentive I'll have not to mess up. Sometimes I'm proud to tell people because I know they'll commend me. Other times I'm a little shy, knowing someone is going to laugh at or ridicule me. But slowly I'm getting to the point where I just put it out there and say, "This is the decision I've made. I'm different from you and it's okay that I feel differently about kissing." I'm not judging anyone else. Just because it's wrong for me doesn't mean it's wrong for someone else.

I've been surprised at many reactions. Some people are set against it, as if it's wrong for me to not kiss anyone. Other people that I thought would roll their eyes have been surprisingly supportive. One of my guy friends whom I've known since I was 6 or so chatted with me about it for a while and then pointed out ways in which I was endangering my own success. I'm glad he took the time to be real with me, because his input has really helped me strengthen my approach.

I have to be careful about how much I talk about love interests, given that this is a public blog. I do have to commend a certain unnamed gentleman, though. I sat him down one evening and said, "I don't want you to kiss me." (I have a hard time being tactful) Then I gave him a one or two sentence explanation. He said okay and told me he respected me for my decision. Now, maybe I expect too much, but that is what he should have done. What he really earned points for, though, was a conversation we had the next day about my decisions and what I need to do or not do to keep from tempting myself too much. He was absolutely and completely supportive and helpful. I guess there are good guys out there. And not just good guys, but good for me guys. :)

Adorable Article

To Kiss or Not to Kiss (Article)

Leaving the Edge (Article)

Tempted

I'm still holding strong. It's been 7 months since I made my commitment. Only about 3 years to go. Woohoo! :)

I will admit though that I was tempted this last weekend. But I didn't even come close so I'm patting myself on the back.

I'm heading back to school in about a month. I'll keep these lips to myself, though! They belong to me and Daisy the giraffe.

Not Alone

A couple weeks ago I visited my old boarding academy. A friend of mine worked as the assistant boys' dean there this last school year. We talked in depth one morning and found we had something in common: we're both saving lip action for commitment. He saved his first kiss for engagement. He did get engaged to a young lady this last year. They didn't end up getting married, but he tells me he doesn't regret saving his first kiss for her (and engagement). And he plans to do it again. I may be crazy by the world's standards, but I'm not alone.

My Last Kiss

This is the last kiss until I'm engaged. I should have savored it a little more.

Background

I'm a 20-year-old senior in college pursuing a bachelor's degree in mathematics and a master's degree in architecture. While I was volunteering at an orphanage in Africa, I read a book and made some startling choices. The book was And the Bride Wore White by Dannah Gresh and the most startling choice was not to kiss another guy until I'm engaged to him.

Some of you may be thinking that sounds easy. It won't be. Others of you may be thinking I'm crazy or screwing up my future. I'm not. Some of you may think, "Well she's probably a homely, chubby girl who is avoiding boys before they have a chance to avoid her." That's not true, either. I'm a pretty, fun-loving, energetic, outgoing blonde with lots of friends. I work two jobs and have above a 3.5 GPA. I've had a few boyfriends--some good, some bad--and most recently broke up with one last October. I won't go into any details about my exes because that's not fair to them. My decision not to kiss another guy until I'm engaged has nothing to do with my exes or my hormones or anything like that. I've made the decision for my own reasons, and here they are:

1. As soon as I get physical (kissing, holding hands, etc) with a guy, I get emotionally attached. Naturally all relationships either end or progress toward marriage. All my relationships so far have ended, and I'm sick of the heartache.

2. I'm waiting for the one God has planned for me. I believe that he'll wait to kiss me because that's what I feel I need to do.

I'm hoping this blog will be amusing to you, at the very least. I don't intend to be rude or disrespectful to anyone, including boys. I figured if I'm making this crazy decision, I'll go through a lot in the next few years, and I might as well chronicle it for someone's enjoyment and benefit.